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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30123936">Living Hell</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedPaladins/pseuds/RedPaladins'>RedPaladins</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dream SMP (Video Blogging RPF)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Character Analysis, Character Study, Gen, Jack Manifold-centric, Meta</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-16 02:14:01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>7,258</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30123936</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedPaladins/pseuds/RedPaladins</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p></p><blockquote>
  <p> <em>A toast to Jack Manifold, always the avenger, never the avenged.</em> </p>
</blockquote><br/>(an explanation of his recent actions, starting with burning Manifold Land.)
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jack Manifold &amp; Niki | Nihachu, Jack Manifold &amp; TommyInnit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>33</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Living Hell</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>A very big thank you to <a href="https://twitter.com/JackManifoldTV?s=09">Jack Manifold</a> for coming up with such an interesting and amazing character like this one; and a very big thank you to all my friends who let me talk about this for days and hyped me up so I could write and post this, and thank you jax for doing all of this and coming up with the "always the avenger, never the avenged line" :] love you guys. </p><p>-please keep in mind that this is all about the character Jack Manifold from DSMP, and not the content creator! I'm fine with this dsmp-verse kind-of-character-study being shared anywhere. </p><p>That being said, enjoy!!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Burning Manifold Land was closing a chapter of his life to begin a new one, with nothing but the hotel to start with. It was a chance to start over, to move on– he had nothing, but the hotel could help because he could make money out of it and connect with people through it (with Quackity, for example). </span>
</p><p>
  <span>So at the start of this, Jack Manifold had nothing material in his possession, and he was lost mentally, because with Tommy gone, who is he? "</span>
  <em>
    <span>Tommy was kind of all I had.</span>
  </em>
  <span>" For a long time, most of his emotions and actions have been linked to Tommy, and now with him dead, Jack Manifold not only has to build his life anew but himself too. And that's hard! It's not easy to look at yourself and realize most of you is based on someone's actions (especially when it's someone you don't like, someone who hurt you). It's not easy to see that, face your flaws and decide to let go, to find new ways of thinking (in this case, I'm talking about the "Tommy took everything from me, Tommy is the cause of all my problems" mentality Jack Manifold has). It's not easy to allow yourself to move on and to do better for yourself, to build yourself and your future out of nothing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But Jack Manifold was ready for it after Tommy's death, or at least everything was set in place for him to do so. It would have been hard, but he was on his way to start this new chapter of his life, even if it's a terrifying thing to do. Manifold Land is gone, and the hotel is his foundation for a better life, with a better future, one where he is free of his hatred for Tommy, where he is Jack Manifold rather than just a man betrayed by his best friend.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Except Tommy comes back. Tommy comes back, and their first interaction goes badly. Did you ever wonder why Jack Manifold reacted like that when he saw Tommy? Why one of his first reactions when Tommy started talking was "</span>
  <em>
    <span>No, you're dead. You're dead!</span>
  </em>
  <span>" Because I did !! Tommy coming back means the hotel isn't Jack Manifold's anymore, because Tommy will want it back. And with the hotel gone– then what will Jack Manifold do? Without the hotel, he doesn't have any connection with Quackity anymore ( "</span>
  <em>
    <span>I want to make sure I'm dealing with the right person, I don't want to waste my time</span>
  </em>
  <span>”) and all the others are busy doing their own things; without the hotel, he doesn't have a place to stay or a thing to do. Without the hotel, starting his new life is much harder than before. It wouldn't be impossible, but it would complicate a lot more things (that were already complicated, to begin with). So yes, Tommy being back threatens (but doesn't kill) that chance to move on easily, it threatens his plan to start over. And that's scary! </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That’s why he doesn’t react well at first; but here’s the thing: he thought Tommy was gone. So, of course, he’s scared and shocked, because that means starting over is going to be more difficult, because they used to be friends but that doesn’t mean Tommy wasn’t awful to him after- so yes, his first reaction isn’t positive, but at that moment he’s not back in his antagonist role yet, he’s not angry at Tommy like he used to be before; or at least not yet, because one of the first things Tommy does is dismissing him when he tries to communicate with him (for example, Jack Manifold saying “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t anyway me, you always anyway me !</span>
  </em>
  <span>” only for Tommy to answer “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Well, of course I anyway you, you’re Jack Manifold</span>
  </em>
  <span>”).</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Which, let’s speak about this for a little bit, let’s talk about their interaction at that moment. Let’s talk about how Jack Manifold actually tries to communicate with Tommy during this. That’s something new for him, it’s a big step and it demands a lot of effort because it isn’t easy, but he still tries to do it and when he starts losing his calm, he stops himself and takes a deep breath (“</span>
  <em>
    <span>This is why you deserved this, this is why I should have been- </span>
  </em>
  <span>[stops talking]”). And maybe I’m looking too much into this, maybe him doing this was nothing, but I believe that in some way, this was his attempt to give Tommy and himself a chance; a chance for Tommy to listen, realize what he's done and apologize, but most importantly a chance for himself to move on even with Tommy back. He grieved him, and by doing that he remembered the person Tommy used to be, he remembered their friendship. And now Tommy is here, alive, in front of him, so maybe, just maybe– maybe if they talk, maybe he can move on even if Tommy is alive too and hey- maybe he can start this chapter with Tommy! They used to be friends. Jack misses his friend.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But Tommy doesn't take that chance, because he doesn’t see the problem, and he brushes it off; says “<em>I literally just died, and you're sat there making it about you, Jack you're selfish.</em>” and that’s when things start to go to shit. When Tommy says that- it becomes clear for Jack Manifold that if he moves on, it has to be without Tommy in his life, because that line makes him remember why he hated Tommy and why he was so angry at him before. But that doesn’t mean Tommy has to die. So Jack Manifold doesn’t stop his attempt at communicating, and he talks honestly; about his feelings (“</span>
  <em>
    <span>I grieved for you</span>
  </em>
  <span>”; “</span>
  <em>
    <span>I was sad, I was upset</span>
  </em>
  <span> [...] </span>
  <em>
    <span>we were friends!</span>
  </em>
  <span>”), about the things Tommy did or more like the things Tommy didn’t do (“</span>
  <em>
    <span>what did you ever do ? you did nothing! All you ever did was take.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” “</span>
  <em>
    <span>You did nothing but take from me, always!</span>
  </em>
  <span>”), he lets it all out. He admits everything, even trying to kill Tommy and what he felt when he learned about his death (“</span>
  <em>
    <span>I've been trying to kill you for two months, even when you died I wasn't happy, I grieved you</span>
  </em>
  <span>”)! That’s huge. Talking is something they both need to do so they can both move on from this relationship, and Jack is taking the first step here, trying his best and giving Tommy a chance; but it’s bad timing because Tommy is clearly not in the right state of mind to do this. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>So Tommy doesn’t listen; he calls Jack Manifold selfish, he doesn’t even hear what Jack is saying (like when he says “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Jack I died. And you didn't even care.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” after Jack already expressed his feelings on the matter, and even when Jack replies by saying that yes, he did care, Tommy insists “</span>
  <em>
    <span>You didn’t even care!</span>
  </em>
  <span>”). He doesn’t even believe Jack Manifold when he tells him that he’s been trying to kill him for the past months, he even tells him about how he died and went to hell! And that’s the breaking point, that’s when Jack Manifold actually talks about the foundation of all their problems: “</span>
  <em>
    <span>You belittle me, you dismiss me, you drop me in a pool of lava, I'm the only person who tries to visit you in your exile, and you forget me like I'm nothing! I launched nukes at you and you didn't even care!</span>
  </em>
  <span>”. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And to that… Tommy proves exactly his point; he belittles and dismisses him before changing the subject (“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Jack, man, I'm sorry I completely don't know what you're saying but I'm sure it was.. words</span>
  </em>
  <span>”), and ends with “</span>
  <em>
    <span>What you're trying to do is creating a villain for yourself, you're so glad I'm back you need to stop creating a villain out of nowhere, alright?</span>
  </em>
  <span>” (which is a really important quote that I will talk about later). </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>At this point it’s just a back and forth of “listen to me!”, except none of them wants to hear what the other is saying, so of course this attempt at communicating doesn’t work. In the end, when Tommy tries to confide in Jack Manifold and ask him to do this later because obviously, he can’t do it after what he’s just gone through (“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Jack, I'm changed. I've learned so much, I saw so many terrible things, I'm trying to hold it together, I'm trying to be shouty like old me, but I'm struggling Jack, alright? So please, for once in your life, just... Just, just pull it on it. Please? Alright?</span>
  </em>
  <span>”) Jack Manifold doesn’t hear that as a “please, I’m not alright and I can’t do this right now”; he interprets it as “I have changed. But I still don't care. And you need to listen to me and my problems because they are more important than yours so you have to even though I won't listen to you”. Which isn’t what Tommy is saying at all, but given how Tommy keeps treating him and how important Tommy is to him (when in return, Jack Manifold isn’t all that important to Tommy) it’s easy to understand how he comes to that interpretation, and he’s rightfully upset about it. (Later he even says it himself: “</span>
  <em>
    <span>The thing is, I'd be willing to talk to him, but he's not. Every single time he puts me down and he says "oh I'm TommyInnit and you're Jack Manifold and you're less than me. I'm sick of it</span>
  </em>
  <span>.")</span>
</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>After this, once Tommy is gone, Jack is hurt because right when he remembered how great they used to be together, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Tommy came back and suddenly everything came flooding back </span>
  </em>
  <span>[to him]</span>
  <em>
    <span> and </span>
  </em>
  <span>[he]</span>
  <em>
    <span> remembered exactly why </span>
  </em>
  <span>[Tommy]</span>
  <em>
    <span>'s a piece of shit</span>
  </em>
  <span>”. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Now I’m gonna drop two quotes here, because it sums up perfectly their situation: “</span>
  <em>
    <span>I feel like a bit of an idiot. Like, I .. genuinely feel like an idiot right now, all I feel like is an idiot</span>
  </em>
  <span>” and "</span>
  <em>
    <span>When Tommy died, I grieved, I was sad, upset, alright? </span>
  </em>
  <span>[...]</span>
  <em>
    <span> I remembered my first day on the server, the day I joined L'Manburg, the day Tommy invited me, and all the laughs we had. But when he came back today, he said a couple of things that have stuck with me. The main one being a simple word; he interrupts me and looks me dead in the eyes and he went "anyways." </span>
  </em>
  <b>
    <em>Anyways</em>
  </b>
  <em>
    <span>. As if, as if he hadn't put me through everything. As if I hadn't just turned to him, looked him dead in the eyes, and told him that I tried to kill him and that he put me through hell. I literally told him, to his face, that he was the reason that I was sent to hell! And he said "anyways".”  </span>
  </em>
  <span>This is Jack Manifold acknowledging what just happened, why he is hurt. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And the thing is, at that moment, right there, when he’s lost because of all the things that just happened, when he’s still hurting, he decides to drop his chance at moving on, that no, he isn’t going to let go of this (“</span>
  <em>
    <span>So you know what? I'm done. I'm done! I'm done with starting again, alright?</span>
  </em>
  <span>”). This interaction, Tommy being back- it didn’t erase his chance to move on; it was still there, but it was a complicated path, one where he has to start from the beginning, one full of unwanted realizations, like the fact that he made himself become someone who doesn’t know what to do or who he is without Tommy in his life; it was a difficult path involving a lot of change, and that’s fucking scary man. It’s scary, but it’s a choice he could have made, his chance for a better life didn’t disappear; but if he was going to take that chance, then he would have to let Tommy and his pain behind him, even without closure. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Which sucks, because he deserves closure! He doesn’t even know why Tommy did that to him ("</span>
  <em>
    <span>I don't know why, I didn't do anything to him, not before all of this.</span>
  </em>
  <span>"), so he can’t understand his side of the story, can’t sympathize with him; he deserves to know why things happened the way they did and he deserves to be heard and receive an apology from Tommy. But the thing is, sometimes you don’t get that. You don’t always get closure from the people who hurt you. And it’s not fair. But you still have to move on, you still have to let go, for yourself- so you can thrive, so you can be happy again. Accepting this is difficult. But Jack Manifold could do it. And for a moment, he starts letting go of his past, when he says “</span>
  <em>
    <span>the day </span>
  </em>
  <span>[Tommy]</span>
  <em>
    <span> died, the day he was killed by Dream, was not the day I should have grieved. I lost my friend a long, long time ago. A long time ago, alright? I lost my friend a long time ago. The day he decided the discs were more important than any of us, and the day he got rid of L'Manburg, the day he sacrificed absolutely everything to take back those discs, that's the day I lost my friend. I lost my friend a long long time ago okay?</span>
  </em>
  <span>". And it’s a good start; Jack Manifold could have taken his chance right there, he could have allowed himself to move on… but the thing is, when Jack Manifold is hurt, he doesn’t let himself be sad and he doesn’t allow himself to be happy again; he masks his hurt with anger and he lets himself be slowly swallowed by it ("</span>
  <em>
    <span>Him coming back today doesn't bring back my friend. It doesn't fill the empty void that I felt when he died</span>
  </em>
  <span>"). Moving on is scary, especially when you have nothing. At that moment, his anger is all he has, and it’s what he knows best. From his point of view, the possibility of moving on, even without closure, is gone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>We all seek comfort in what's familiar; and for Jack Manifold, that's to be the person who got hurt by Tommy. He lost himself in his pain a long time ago; yes, his name is Jack Manifold, but except being the man who got betrayed by his best friend, who is he? He doesn’t know that. That’s why he’s so quick to get back in his antagonist role, why it’s so easy for him to deliberately choose to not take that chance (“</span>
  <em>
    <span>I no longer wish to start again</span>
  </em>
  <span>”). If he starts being angry again, if he lets himself become who he used to be before Tommy’s death, then he doesn't have to question who he is outside Tommy, because he’s now back and by doing so “</span>
  <em>
    <span>All he's done is give </span>
  </em>
  <span>[Jack Manifold] </span>
  <em>
    <span>a new purpose</span>
  </em>
  <span>”, which is “</span>
  <em>
    <span>to kill the vermin that is TommyInnit, because he is not</span>
  </em>
  <span> [his] </span>
  <em>
    <span>friend and he hasn't been for a very long time; he died a very long time ago.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And now that’s the part where it gets even more interesting. Remember that “</span>
  <em>
    <span>What you're trying to do is creating a villain for yourself</span>
  </em>
  <span>” line? Yeah, that’s when we’re gonna start talking about it. After deciding to kill Tommy, Jack Manifold justifies his choice by saying this: “</span>
  <em>
    <span>The only thing that remains is a ball of chaos. And what did he say? "</span>
  </em>
  <span>[Dream]</span>
  <em>
    <span>'s still in there". And what's Tommy doing? The same thing he always does! Going after him. It's like he's not satisfied with the fact that he's locked away; he has to go and he has to start more and more chaos </span>
  </em>
  <span>[...] </span>
  <em>
    <span>me, Tubbo, Niki, everyone loses when he does this!</span>
  </em>
  <span> [...] </span>
  <em>
    <span>I came back because I had a purpose on this server, and it was to take him out of it, because at the end of the day he has done nothing but ruin it for everyone else.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Later on, he also says “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Dream didn't bring back my friend with that book, he brought back a monster. And I will be the one to make sure he hurts no one else on this server, because he's hurt me way too much.”</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Now I have a lot of thoughts about this, but let’s start with this one: Tommy, from Jack Manifold’s perspective. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>At that moment, Tommy isn’t even a person anymore for him; his friend died a long time ago, and now all that remains is a ball of chaos, something that causes destruction, a monster that can’t be controlled (even worse, he thinks of Tommy as Dream’s toy). Thinking of Tommy as something that isn’t human makes it easier to be angry at him, and it’s comforting in a strange way, because if Tommy is just a ball of chaos that can’t be controlled- then it means he doesn’t keep hurting Jack Manifold on purpose, that he has no control over it and that’s why he never stops. But it’s not all it does; dehumanizing Tommy comforts him in his idea that he is in the right, he is the hero, and Tommy is the villain that needs to be stopped. That’s my second point: the hero &amp; villain dynamic.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When Tommy said that Jack Manifold was trying to make a villain for himself, he was partially right. He was wrong in the context in which he said that: Jack Manifold telling him why and how Tommy hurt him wasn’t him making Tommy a villain, it was just him sharing his point of view. However, if you think about this quote for this exact moment, then he is right. Jack Manifold is creating a villain for himself by doing this; because if Tommy is the villain, then Jack Manifold is the hero, and we all know why he wants to do that. Heroes aren’t silenced; they don’t get dismissed, they aren’t belittled, they don’t go unnoticed no matter what they do, people don’t forget about the heroes. When a hero says something, people listen. When a hero is hurt, people help, and they listen. How does he know that? Because that’s what people often do with Tommy. (A good example would be the others’ reactions to each of their deaths, something that Jack Manifold is rightfully angry at but is putting the blame on the wrong person: “</span>
  <em>
    <span>everyone sees him come back to life: ‘oh you died? That's really sad Tommy, I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I crawl back from hell, by myself, and everyone I've told goes: ‘oh that's cool Jack’. As if it wasn't like I was put there by my best friend!</span>
  </em>
  <span>”) So yes, Jack Manifold putting himself in the hero's place is his way to cope with being left alone, hurt, and betrayed by someone he trusted. He deserves to be listened to, and thinking of himself as a hero is him acknowledging his own pain, it’s his way to be noticed, even if it’s just by himself because no one else will listen (or at least not yet, and if there is then it certainly isn’t Tommy, which right now, is the one Jack Manifold cares about the most). He also knows, deep down, that he’s in the wrong- so thinking of himself as a hero is him trying to convince himself that he’s in the right, too, because a hero doesn't do things for selfish reasons; they do it for other people too. He’s not going to kill Tommy because he hurt him, he’s doing it to protect Tubbo, Niki, all the others too. And it’s true, but this argument is mostly an excuse, just a way for him to feel more justified in his actions, because in reality, he’s not doing this for the others, he’s doing this for himself because that’s the only way he knows how to get justice and closure, you know, with the only universal language being violence and all of the trauma that goes with being on the dsmp. But I do believe that a part of him actually does this to protect the others too; Jack Manifold is a character that cares a lot about other people in his own twisted way, whether it’s Tommy or Niki and Tubbo; he’s just good at hiding it from other people and himself. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There’s a third point, that’s less obvious but still very interesting in my opinion. Let’s focus on the “</span>
  <em>
    <span>and what's Tommy doing ? </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span><span class="u">The same thing he always does</span>! <span class="u">Going after him.</span> <span class="u">It's like he's not satisfied</span></span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span> with the fact that he's locked away; </span>
  </em>
  <span class="u">
    <em>
      <span>he has to go and he has to start more and more chaos</span>
    </em>
  </span>
  <span>”, more importantly on the underlined part. We have Tommy, someone who got hurt, doing the same thing he always does: going after the one who hurt him, like he’s never satisfied with the outcome of their fights, because he always has to go against him which ends up bringing more and more chaos around him… Doesn’t that sound familiar? Isn’t that the exact same thing Jack Manifold is doing, but with Tommy instead of Dream? This thought brings a whole new perspective to his character, because he’s doing the same thing he’s reproaching Tommy for; so what if one of the reasons he’s so angry at Tommy is because he unknowingly sees himself in Tommy? Is he projecting his frustration coming from his inability to move on and break the cycle he’s in onto Tommy? It would make sense, because it’s easier to be angry at other people for doing the things we do rather than take that energy to change what we do.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Another interesting thing to see is how Jack Manifold keeps separating Tommy into different people; the Tommy who was his friend, the Tommy who hurt him, and the Tommy Dream brought back. And he does that so it’s easier to justify his action now, because if the Tommy he kills is the monster Dream brought back then he doesn’t have to feel guilty about killing his friend, because he lost the Tommy who was his friend a long time ago. It’s his way to protect himself from the hard truth he doesn’t want to see too; and that is the fact that they’re all the same person, that yes, the Tommy who was his friend is the one who killed him and didn’t care. It’s a truth that hurts, and that’s why he’s been avoiding it- but with grieving eventually comes acceptance, and the day he faces that truth will be the day where it’s easier for Jack Manifold to take the first step into becoming who he really is, the first step to his new and happier beginning. </span>
</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>There’s also the fact that Jack Manifold is actually letting go of things and moving on… Just not in the right direction. He’s letting go of the idea of getting closure or his happy ending just because Tommy exists, and if Tommy exists then he has to fight him. It’s becoming an obsession (“</span>
  <em>
    <span>It feels so good to have a purpose again. I was walking around so aimlessly, I didn't want to log on, what was I supposed to do?</span>
  </em>
  <span>”), because it’s the only thing that defines him, and yes he could have become more than this but he let go of that possibility when he chose not to move on. By focusing on killing Tommy and his hatred for him, he will probably fail to see people trying to help him or see other solutions, and that will cause his own downfall. There’s a lot of reasons why he’s so adamant about not budging his position and refusing to heal; most of it comes down to him being so scared of change that he’s ready to do anything to avoid it, and if that means lying to himself then so be it; being Tommy’s victim is practically all he’s ever known, so it brings him comfort to stay in that role because it feels safe. There’s also the fact that he’s always sabotaging himself by never taking the chances presented to him; he desperately craves healing and moving on (because that’s what he deserves) but he doesn’t really believe that he will ever obtain that, or that he even deserves it, which is why he always chose the worst option possible even when it’s not on purpose.</span>
</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>Do you ever think about the fact that Jack Manifold is so alone in his life that the only way for him to hear positive things about himself is to be arrogant? Which is why he goes around saying he’s better than Dream because he didn’t need a book to bring himself back, and that once he kills Tommy he won’t be a coward like Dream was and he won’t bring Tommy back? And his arrogance is so hollow- it’s one of the main things that make him hypocritical, because he can brag about this all he wants, we all know it’s not true, not with how he reacted when he learned Tommy died. If he does end up killing Tommy, it won’t do anything- it won’t feel the void he’s feeling, it won’t make him hurt less, he’s just going to regret it for the rest of his days; but he can’t see that now (or maybe he simply doesn’t want to- but if he starts thinking about that, he would go back to wondering who he is outside of Tommy’s influence, and he doesn’t want that). “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Jack Manifold doesn't give a shit</span>
  </em>
  <span>." and yet, for someone who claims that, he still can’t let go of Tommy. That’s all I have to say about this. Jack Manifold, my hypocritical beloved.</span>
</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>Do you remember when I said that he was using the excuse of “I’m doing this for other people because I care about them” when he was justifying his choice to kill Tommy? It’s the first argument he tries to use to make Niki join his side (“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Every time he fought Dream everything's gone to shit, we lost everything so many times, and look at what you've got now- you don't want to lose </span>
  </em>
  <span>[your city]</span>
  <em>
    <span>.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”). And yes, it’s to convince her to fight Tommy with him again, but let’s focus on the “</span>
  <em>
    <span>you don’t want to lose</span>
  </em>
  <span> [your city]” part for a moment! </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Niki is one of the people he cares about. And he shows it, in his own fucked up way, because when you grow up on the dsmp you don’t learn how to show you care in a healthy way. It makes sense to him that she would join him in this, because she did before, and now she has something to protect- so when she starts saying why she doesn’t really care anymore (“</span>
  <em>
    <span>We don't really need a nation though, do we?</span>
  </em>
  <span>”) he doesn’t understand. And when she explains what her city is, what anarchy is, his first reaction is this: “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Excuse me while I go take all your things. What yours is mine if you say what you say. </span>
  </em>
  <span>[...] </span>
  <em>
    <span>Niki, do you not see the flaw in that ?</span>
  </em>
  <span> [...] </span>
  <em>
    <span>It doesn't work, Niki. What happens when someone comes along and they decide that they want to take too much?</span>
  </em>
  <span>”. And yeah, that’s an asshole move- but he’s not just saying that just to hurt her; he’s trying to prove her wrong, not just because he’d like her to join his side, but because he cares about her and doesn’t want to see her be hurt when things go to shit again (because it’s doomed to happen; they’ve learned times and times ago that good things don’t stay intact for long in this server). Except Niki isn’t like Jack Manifold anymore; she’s moving on (“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Nothing! I just believe in the good of people and that they won't take everything.</span>
  </em>
  <span>") and she doesn’t want to be dragged back into how things were before, which is very admirable of her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But the thing about Jack is that he never takes the time to think about what the others are feeling or thinking; he only sees his perspective and doesn’t bother doing otherwise, either because he doesn’t know how to, or just because he simply doesn’t want to. So for him, seeing Niki not going along with his plan is frustrating, and having her do that when he’s still angry at what happened before makes it like she’s not listening to him, even if that’s not true. He could try and take the time to express his emotions correctly, to communicate- but hey, the last time he did that was just a moment ago with Tommy, and that didn’t go well, did it? He's been proven so many times that the only way for people to listen and learn is through violence, and if Niki doesn't believe him when he says her system is doomed, then fine- he will show her. And so he starts killing the chickens to prove his point.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Except. Except at that moment, something he’s not used to happens: Niki doesn’t fight back. She’s not angry or surprised by his actions, because she expected them; and when he says “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Well who is to stop me, Niki?</span>
  </em>
  <span>" she doesn’t answer his taunt. She’s tired of living like this, she “</span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span>[s]</span>
  <em>
    <span> people do these things, </span>
  </em>
  <span>[they]</span>
  <em>
    <span> have seen this countless times</span>
  </em>
  <span>”. She knows that, but she’s moving on, so she believes that’s not all there is to it. It’s something Jack Manifold doesn’t understand, that’s why he tries to break her faith (“</span>
  <em>
    <span>exactly, and right now we're faced with the person who's done a lot of these things, done a lot of questionable things, and you're not willing to step up! You just want to sit here and be an anarchist!</span>
  </em>
  <span>”); there’s a part of him that does that because he doesn’t want to be alone in his pain, so he tries to bring her down with him; and a part of him says that because he cares about her. The line “</span>
  <em>
    <span>How is that going to work when I come to kill the chickens and the cows? I'm not gonna do it but I could. I might.</span>
  </em>
  <span>" isn’t a threat (and at this point, you can hear in his voice that he isn’t angry anymore, but he’s starting to be desperate, because this is unknown territory- Niki isn’t fazed even when he used violence, so what is he supposed to do now? Actually talk??), it’s a warning; it’s him being worried because she’s defenseless and is okay with it, is okay with trusting people again (and therefore is okay with the possibility of being hurt again). And this is unknown territory for her too; she’s as lost as he is on this, she doesn’t know what she will do if that happens, but on the contrary of him, she has hope. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>I started baking again.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” is more than a simple statement, it’s her moving on, it’s her breaking the cycle of violence to find new ways; it’s her saying “I don’t know where I’m going yet, but that’s okay because I’m going to find myself and the things I need along the way.” This, this whole thing, is her doing what Jack Manifold couldn’t do. And he sees that and he’s happy for her (“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Look I'm really happy for you Niki, that you've managed to find things to do</span>
  </em>
  <span>”) but he still doesn’t understand, because he can’t do that (and don’t worry, we’ll elaborate on that later).</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Something important about this too, is how their interaction ends. Because after, he tells her what he feels about Tommy and moving on; he communicates with her. And unlike Tommy, she doesn’t dismiss him, she doesn’t belittle him; she says “</span>
  <em>
    <span>You know what Jack ? I hear you, and I understand you, I have been through the same things</span>
  </em>
  <span>” and that’s more than anyone ever did for him. She says she will think about what he told her, and that’s more than anyone ever did for him. And she says “</span>
  <em>
    <span>No it's okay I get it, </span>
  </em>
  <span>[...]</span>
  <em>
    <span> it's okay, I'm not mad.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” and she says, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>you can always come here.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”; she says “</span>
  <em>
    <span>I miss our little duo that we had going on</span>
  </em>
  <span>" and the significance of all of this -Niki acknowledging Jack Manifold’s feelings and going out of her way to make sure he understands what she’s saying and not interpreting it as something else- is huge. He’s not used to this kind of situation, where he is actually listened to; and you can hear the change in his voice, how he’s not angry anymore and how he’s ashamed of what he just did. ("</span>
  <em>
    <span>I appreciate that. I really do, I actually do appreciate that. I didn't mean to kill the chickens, I just wanted to-</span>
  </em>
  <span>" "</span>
  <em>
    <span>Well thank you, thank you for at least thinking about it.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”) </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And this short interaction could mean so much for the future; their characters are heading in opposite directions right now, with Niki moving on with the Syndicate and with Jack Manifold falling back into his antagonist role, but they could impact each other’s development without realizing it. Niki could have a positive impact on Jack Manifold later on, because she could show him that moving on doesn’t mean forgiving Tommy for the things he did, and it doesn’t mean he’s going to get left behind like was before (first with Ghostbur forgetting about him, then with Tommy not caring about him).</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>In the end, that’s the thing with Jack Manifold; his definition of moving on and letting go isn’t the correct one. When he talks to Niki about Tommy and why he can’t do what she’s doing, he says “</span>
  <em>
    <span>I can't, just do things. I can't just go do things while he's around, running around.</span>
  </em>
  <span> [...] </span>
  <em>
    <span>He has no redeeming qualities left, I've tried, I've tried to search for them. He showed up today, and he dismissed everything I had to say. I tried to open up, I told him about what he did to me, and he just shrugged it off as if it was nothing</span>
  </em>
  <span>." and that shows how he ties forgiving with moving on; and of course he can’t forgive Tommy (not only because he doesn’t understand why Tommy did the things he did, but also because Tommy keeps dismissing him). For him, moving on isn’t an option because he can’t forgive Tommy, therefore “</span>
  <em>
    <span>the only way to stop that is to remove him from the picture.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But forgiving isn’t the only thing he ties with moving on; forgetting is one of them too (“</span>
  <em>
    <span>It's like she forgot everything we've been through together ! It's like it never happened.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”). And he doesn’t want to do that- why would he want to forget about Tommy hurting him? It wouldn’t be fair, because if he forgets, then it means what Tommy did to him wasn’t important; if he forgets, then who’s going to hold Tommy accountable for his actions? If moving on means forgiving and forgetting, then it means letting Tommy get away with his actions (“</span>
  <em>
    <span>He's been through a lot but we've been through a lot Niki, and what we haven't done is sacrifice nations and people!</span>
  </em>
  <span>”), and that’s the last thing Jack Manifold wants (and that’s normal, because what Tommy did should be addressed).</span>
</p><p>
  <span>So with Niki moving on, there’s not just the “forgetting what Tommy did and letting him get away with it” part that bothers Jack Manifold; there’s also his fear that by moving on, she will forget about him too, because he’s tied to Tommy, and because it’s what people do, leaving him behind and forgetting about him. So her moving on feels like a betrayal, even if he’s happy for her (“</span>
  <em>
    <span>If she was really with me then..., how do you just turn around and go 'oh it's fine, it's okay, I'll just let him live he's been through a lot like yeah! He's gonna put everyone through a lot, again, if we don't stop him</span>
  </em>
  <span>"). Of course he’s happy for her, she’s his friend; but she’s one of the only friends he has left, and he already lost one- so would it be so bad, if he were to try and drag her down with him, so he can stay in her life? (Maybe he knows he’ll try to bring her down with him and that’s why he goes from “</span>
  <em>
    <span>We’re still friends, hopefully.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” to “</span>
  <em>
    <span>I wouldn’t call it a duo, Niki</span>
  </em>
  <span>” when she says she missed what they had going on; maybe he’s taking his distance to protect her from his obsession, or maybe it’s to protect himself from feeling hurt when she eventually forgets about him too.)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>(Another example he has of moving on, apart from Niki, is Tubbo, or at least his perspective of Tubbo; because he says “[Tubbo] </span>
  <em>
    <span>literally replaced </span>
  </em>
  <span>[Tommy]</span>
  <em>
    <span> with Ranboo</span>
  </em>
  <span>”. And… Again, doesn’t that way of thinking remind you of someone we know? I mean, isn't that what Tommy thought too? Yes, this is me making another Jack Manifold and Tommy parallel-) </span>
</p><p>
  <span>So yeah, part of why he doesn’t want to move on is because he has the wrong definition of it; and even without this definition, he wouldn’t be able to, because he doesn’t know </span>
  <b>how </b>
  <span>("</span>
  <em>
    <span>How do you just move on ? Knowing that he's still alive and could do it all over again</span>
  </em>
  <span>”). And having Niki around could change that; it could show him that it’s not about forgiving and forgetting, that it’s scary but that doesn’t mean it won’t be okay in the end. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It all comes down to this: you can't help people who don't want to be helped, so Niki can say or do anything she wants, if Jack Manifold doesn't want to hear it, then he won't- and judging by how he’s been treating her (not listening to her, interrupting her all the time), he’s not going to want to hear about that any time soon. I’m not saying that he won’t; because maybe he will, or maybe too late, and maybe that's when he'll try to change for good. (When I say "too late" I mean that maybe he will have to lose Niki to actually change for good. And I say lose Niki in the way that even if she can be proof that moving on/letting go is a good thing and that doesn't mean she'll forget about him, she deserves happiness too; and to have that she might have to cut off Jack Manifold from her life, because for now, he doesn't listen to her or doesn't let her speak, and he hurts her sometimes; yes, he regrets it, but that doesn't mean the damage isn't done. So yeah, maybe she will have to stop talking to him in order to be happy and free, and maybe this separation will be his trigger to wanting to change for the better. Or maybe it won’t, and on the contrary, it will make him worse as a result of being so lonely- but that’s not up for us to decide, so we’ll have to wait and see!).</span>
</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Every time I try to do my own thing, alright, I get involved and then get entangled in his shit.</span>
  </em>
  <span>" That's something I also wanted to point out; Jack Manifold says this, but it’s just another example of his hypocrisy. It’s true that every time he tries something, Tommy ends up being here somewhat, but that’s not really Tommy’s fault- it’s just that Jack Manifold revolves around him, so of course they always end up on each other’s stuff. If Jack Manifold tried to do his own thing from scratch, something that belonged to him and only him, I doubt that would end with him somewhat entangled in more Tommy drama; but he can’t do that, because he’s locked himself in this role of being Tommy’s victim.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There’s also the recurring thought of “Why does he get to have this?”. First with Niki, when he says “</span>
  <em>
    <span>he's been through a lot but we've been through a lot too Niki, and what we haven't done is sacrifice nations and people!</span>
  </em>
  <span>" and he’s right to be angry about that, but we all know what the real problem here is, and it’s “he’s been through a lot but I’ve been through a lot too, so why does he get sympathy and I don’t?”. And it’s true that it’s unfair, because Tommy might be a child but Jack Manifold is barely eighteen too, and he deserves support; the only problem is that when there are people around that can give it to him, like Niki, he’s awful to them, because he doesn’t know what else to do and because he’s stuck in his own head. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"</span>
  <em>
    <span>It's not fair! Why does he get to do this, why does he get to do all these things, why does he get the opportunity to take from me, and every single time I try to get even, something stops me. Why does he get to take, why does everyone give him these options? It's not fair.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” So many of his problems can be linked back to Tommy because he blames Tommy for everything, but in reality most of his problems are caused by himself. He thinks the world is giving Tommy all he needs to be happy, because of main character's plot armor and all of that, but we know that’s not true because we can see Tommy’s POV, but Jack Manifold can’t. So he’s left with all these questions unanswered, and he constantly hears people asking about Tommy, and he sees everyone always giving him another chance, but he gets nothing at all, because no one cares about Jack Manifold or what he does. That's why later he's so angry about the hotel too, because he saw that as Tommy taking away his chance to move on. If the hotel was a good place to start over for Jack, then it is for Tommy too– and why does Tommy get the chance to start over, but not him? And there's also the fact that everything Tommy does ends up having a huge impact on the server, but when Jack Manifold does something, no one cares, he doesn't get recognization and he's left unnoticed once again ("</span>
  <em>
    <span>No one's done that on this server, I built a nuclear program!</span>
  </em>
  <span>")</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s not fair. But he needs to understand that sometimes there’s nothing you can do about it; he has to make peace with that if he ever wants to move on. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>In the end, it all comes back to the cycle of violence, where if you can’t be listened to or noticed by the people you want, then you make them listen to you and you make them notice you. For Jack Manifold, if that means becoming a villain, if that means lying to himself, if that means losing himself in his hurt and never letting himself be happy, then so be it. And maybe that will change, or maybe it won’t; either way, his development is going to be interesting to see, and I’m curious to know if he’s going to be one of these tragic characters that have tragic ends or if he will have a breaking point that will make him do better. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And on that, I leave you with this thought: coming back from hell is Jack Manifold’s proudest accomplishment, but given how his life has been since he came back- did he really come back? Because this sure does sound like his personal hell, so who’s to be sure he isn’t stuck in it? </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I'd be happy to hear your thoughts about this or whatever you want to say about c!Jack Manifold, just remember to be respectful in the comments :] thank you so much for reading this, i hope you had a good time! all the quotes come from the "Living Prison with Dream" vod from Tommy's vod and the "He's alive and I'm not happy about it" from Jack Manifold's vod. </p><p> <a href="https://twitter.com/_itsmeyaboi">Twitter </a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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